DARKO DRAMA!/Transformers Review

Whoa. This offseason of ups and downs seems to just keep flying at a frantic pace.

Darko's agent on his client's chances of signing with the Magic after getting Rashard Lewis:

"There's no chance. Put it in big capital letters," Cornstein said. "You can say that as long as Otis Smith is the general manager of the Orlando Magic, there's no chance." Cornstein said that when the Magic did not contact him when the free-agency courting period began, "He didn't want to be here in the end. If Otis Smith had been a decent human and told us that Rashard Lewis was the player they wanted and would have to sacrifice Darko to get him, my reaction wouldn't have been happiness. But I would have said, 'I appreciate you telling me.'"Instead, the guy told us Darko was a priority, and he lied."

Whoa.

Sooo um, on to plan B...whatever that might be.

As for the Rashard part of the deal, Lewis has said officially how happy he is to be a part of the Magic. In addition, John Denton and others has confirmed that Seattle and Orlando are talking of doing a sign and trade that would be Lewis and Earl Watson for Dooling, Arroyo, and Garrity (expiring contracts) with possibly a future 1st rounder going to Seattle. This would give the Magic a bunch of money to spend this offseason once again...cap money that was originally thought to be going towards Darko, but I guess not anymore. I would LOVE for this sign and trade to happen as we'd get rid of our glut of point guards, get a quality player in Earl Watson, AND get cap money to get another player this offseason. Maybe Gerald Wallace and/or a cheap big man? Maybe even Darko if we offer him enough money (money seriously talks in the NBA).

The sky is the limit.

With this insanity swirling around our team I have not had a chance to really talk about Transformers the Movie. My review will be substantially shorter due to the crazy amount of goings on, so without further ado, here is my vague, not-give-anything-away review of Transformers:

First of all, the movie starts with a bang. Right from the very get-go it is wall to wall action and enjoyment. Besides the new characters Blackout and Barricade (the helicopter and the police car), I actually found it surprisingly relatable to the old cartoon, which was big for me. The other big thing was that whomever the editor was decided to cut out a lot of the Michael Bay-isms that usually ruin his movies: extended slow motion kissing scenes, horrible rock music inserted at random times, a drawn out ending that really messes up things...all were super short and sweet in Transformers and made a big difference. As for the format of the movie, I'd say the first half is almost straight comedy and character development and the second half is almost straight action. Everything worked really well together and the effects are truly jaw dropping. Equally jaw dropping is the actess Megan Fox, who might have the most accurate last name I have ever heard. If she isn't huge after this movie then there aren't enough sleazy men running Hollywood for my tastes. I will also say for the record that Starscream friggin' rocks in this movie, and I didn't even care for his character growing up. Shia Labeouf is also fantastic, something I never thought I would be writing.

If there is one thing to be critical of, I would say that the action scenes aren't the most coherent and it is a bit tough to follow things at times. Michael Bay has always had trouble with this, and more than one time I had trouble figuring out who was who as the robots fought. That being said, ILM did a fantastic job with the transformations and I frequently found myself cheering out loud.

Out of 5 stars, I give Transformers a 4.5. It was nearly perfect in my eyes and a really, really fun summer movie. I felt like I was 5 again, a feeling I hadn't experienced since I saw Jurassic Park. They already greenlit number 2, and I could not be happier.